Observations about “Never Let Me Go” by Kazuo Ishiguro: my interpretations-2

*contains spoilers*

In the previous part of this blog post, I talked about a singular interpretation I had regarding the novel, and so I wasn’t initially expecting it to take the space it did. I didn’t realize the true extent of my interpretation, how it could somehow spread over to the entire book and somehow relate to most of the sub-topics and themes explored throughout it, and theories until I began to write to someone about them.

This also goes on to show how sometimes the best way to solidify or enhance new ideas (or ideas at all) is to simply talk to someone about it, even if that person is yourself. To write about them, to be proud of them but to also be accepting constructive criticism regarding where you went wrong or rather, where you might have improved. This was a simple side note, now onto the interpretation. (This will be my second interpretation, but I believe it will once again take up the entirety of this blog post. Although this is my first novel of Ishiguro’s, I can see the sincerity of the positive comments left regarding his novels about how they invent a new genre on its own and how Ishiguro approaches whatever concept -whether it be the genre of science fiction, or the concept of cloning, or children’s perception of individuals who are considered to be “lesser” in society-, both by critics and by Goodreads users, who I’ve found are usually harsher than critics.)

I will now focus on Kathy and her perception of the world, and herself, throughout the novel. Kathy is the protagonist, and since the novel is written in first person narrative, the only character whose mind the reader can read and whose conscious thoughts the reader can access. Throughout the novel, she’s depicted as a relatively more naive girl (especially compared to Ruth, her best friend). Her role as a carer and how long she has managed to continue doing it further develops the reader’s perception of Kathy being a sweet person, and sometimes even someone who doesn’t get what she deserves; like someone who can’t get to be a donor and be taken care of, and is instead forced to live a life of a carer, a life of solitude and of seeing others die, caring for others, individuals who she has to grow to care about and even somehow love though she’s always well aware that they will pass (or “complete”), who she knows won’t make it past the other donation (or the one after that) anyways.

Kathy’s perception of herself is mostly negative at the beginning of the novel due to Ruth toying with her self-esteem. She also feels marginalized in the context of sex; at Hailsham, the students are taught that sex is what could be a beautiful thing if done with the right person, or an act that could leave you feeling rather empty inside if done with the wrong person. After learning about the concept of sex, or desires, Kathy begins to contextualize some “urges” that she has gotten for most of her life. She opens up to Ruth and mentions how she gets the strongest urge to have sex with someone, and asks her if she feels the same way. Ruth says that she doesn’t, though further in the novel, during the time in which Kathy becomes Ruth’s carer and Ruth decides to step forward to own up to some of the rather bad things she has done in the past, and somehow have a catharsis, she admits that she used to have those urges too, but simply wanted to exclude Kathy. However, Ruth is rather too late with this confession, late to the point to which it perhaps would have been better to not come forward at all. Because this simple act makes Kathy feel excluded, marginalized, ostracized, her entire childhood, specifically during her time at Hailsham. Of course, it’s not this simple act alone. But this act seems to be the foundation for all the exclusion Kathy feels; every time she feels as though she might belong, every time she begins to make a connection with someone who doesn’t know, or isn’t closer, with Ruth, either she feels too guilty for pursuing a relationship unbenoknowst to her best friend, or Ruth steps in and establishes her obvious superiority to Kathy and becomes friends with that someone instead. (Yup, Ruth is veeery toxic.)

Perhaps this sense of exclusion and an understanding of what it’s like to be excluded, or perhaps that special spark in someone that allows them to be a carer for way longer than their counterparts, is why she begins to sympathize with Tommy. Tommy, soon-to-be Ruth’s boyfriend in the novel, is a tween/young adult that regularly has tantrums, and is thus driven to insanity by his friends so that they can see him crack, see him go mad. The reader later understands that most of his aggression stems from his feelings of insufficiency, because he simply doesn’t feel creative. At a place where creativity is the only thing you have to show for yourself, where your self-worth is determined by whether or not your artwork, or sculptures, or music, gets into Madame’s gallery, Tommy is simply not creative. He fails, time and time again, to get into the gallery. And thus the tantrums. But one day, a rather peculiar guardian at Hailsham talks to him and reassures him that he doesn’t have to push himself to be something he’s not, that it’s okay for him not to be creative. This relieves Tommy of most of his concerns about insufficiency, and though his friends still try to drive him crazy, he simply doesn’t respond, which eventually makes them stop, since they can’t get the satisfaction of seeing that they have the ability to drive another human absolutely crazy. But before he has this chat with the guardian and thus becomes a calmer, more centered individual, Kathy is pretty much the only person that even makes contact with him without the intention of provoking him or driving him to a tantrum. The reason for this is never truly revealed, though it’s probably simply from Kathy’s kind heart and her natural sympathy towards Tommy. Throughout the novel, there seems to be some foreshadowing towards how Tommy and Kathy might eventually grow to be a couple; but this never happens since the timing’s never right, mostly because Ruth is dating Tommy. In her catharsis -that I previously mentioned- she also admits how she knew that Tommy and Kathy belonged together, and how she could see so obviously that Tommy and her would never work out. But she still kept dating Tommy, just because.

It seems to me that Kathy is in a vicious cycle of self-hate. Though it may not be as intense as self-hate or vicious cycles are portrayed in novels or in movies particularly, everything about this novel is subtle, and so it makes utmost sense that the portrayal of Kathy’s feelings of insufficiency are ever so subtle as well.

The vicious cycle that Kathy’s in stems from the fact that she is a clone- that she was cloned from someone who, although none of the students in Hailsham want to admit it, was a person who wasn’t famous, wasn’t rich, or well-known. Someone whose clone could walk around freely in the world and this would cause no trouble to both parties because either the person who the student has been cloned from is dead due to bad habits, or however the student may look like the clonee, the clonee is now unrecognizable, because there is no way that that student will have to experience, or will want to do, what the clonee did and will therefore never look like them. In other words, the clonees are considered to be criminals, prostitutes, drug addicts, homeless people or so on. Though the guardians never mention such thing -but to be fair, you wouldn’t tell a person that they were completely genetically identical to a prostitute or a criminal-, the student have so convinced themselves of the fact that they are clnoed from such people that Kathy regularly browses through porn magazines secretly sneaked into the school. This has one obvious reason; Kathy believes she was cloned from a pornstar or a prostitue because 1) if all the Hailsham students are cloned from such people, why wouldn’t she be cloned from a pornstar? and 2) she tries to somehow justify, to blame her inexplicable desire to have sex at random times on someone, a desire that makes her feel so very excluded, one that no other girl seems to possess -though she has only asked Ruth-. So, Kathy’s cycle of self-hate begins with the fact that she is possibly, and probably, cloned from a pornstar -she somehow tries to convince herself of this because this would explain those inexplicable urges and make her feel somewhat less of a “weirdo”-. I believe that this directly connects to the marginalization I discussed earlier, because since no other girl is feeling these desires, none of the other girls must be cloned from a prostitute, right? So not only are her desires completely different, her genetic composition, her very being, is also completely different from her friends’. So, because she considers herself to be so low on the Hailsham food chain, she accepts whatever friendship is available, whether that’s toxic or not -though she doesn’t know that no one else is aware of the feelings she’s feeling, and no one else feels the same way-.

Side note: This also goes on to show how sometimes, we need outside eyes to allow us to see situations correctly. Because sometimes, our own perspective can be against us, our own brain convincing us of the opposite of what our heart wants to believe. This is especially true in the case of mental-health related issues like depression or anxiety; where our mind can sometimes convince us that we were annoying that one night, causing us to spiral into a cycle of -once again- self-depreciation and complete paralysis, inability to leave the house but inability to make up excuses for not attending plans. (One novel that truly captivates this and shines a light towards the life of individuals with mental illnesses is “Turtles All The Way Down” by John Green, it’s truly amazing!)

-continued- And the friendship that is most available is Ruth’s rather awful friendship, though Kathy can’t really recognize this because she doesn’t have any other serious friendships, and even when she recognizes some toxic patterns, she chooses to ignore them, or somehow makes her subconscious believe that these patterns are normal. This cycle continues throughout Kathy’s life, though not as intensely. But this blog post is too long to cover it now, perhaps I’ll discuss it in another one.

See you and have a great day!!!!

(PS. I’m going to be visiting colleges in Boston, New York, Philadelphia and CA over the next couple of weeks, and I’ll write down honest reviews about the campuses and the environments for anyone interested!)